Thursday, February 10, 2011

Happy Birthday Berlyn!

From the moment you were placed into my arms I knew that you were special and God had great things planned for your life.
Today we celebrate your life with love and thanksgiving.
You have battled all odds and you're my hero. When I found out that you came to us with a broken heart I wanted so bad to take away your pain and wanted to trade places with you. I had no idea how my life would be changed forever.
You've endured more stuff in your first year, than alot of us adults may take a whole life to experience. And all with your sweet smile. I really don't know whether I could have passed the year of trials and tribulations without your strength and courage. Whenever I wanted to cry and hide myself from everything, God showed me your strength and told me that He was in control. When I would cry out to God, he gave me peace and reminded me that you're His own. You're so very special and everything about you is a testimony of God's faithfulness, love, healing, promise and grace. Your life has taught me lessons that may have taken me a lifetime to learn. Your journey has brought me in contact with people, that only heaven could have made it possible. Even though your journey continues, we look to the future with promise and much hope. God has brought you this far and has a purpose for you.
You have certainly impacted my life and I know the lives of many, and that's just the beginning. I treasure you and honor God for allowing us to get to this day.
Thank you for opening my eyes to many things that I was so blinded to before.
I love you more than words will ever be able to express.

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Heart update

I think this picture pretty much says it all.

Berlyn's heart appointment check up was on Monday and we couldn't have asked for better news.

He checked her out and said that her heart is looking good and her stenosis is still at the mild range right now. He said it actually appeared to improve slightly from the last appointment. What a huge relief that was to hear. We see him again in August to see where we are at.

We want to thank everyone that continues to pray for our little girl. We really appreciate your love and support. She sure is a fighter.

We are happy to have the good news so we can enjoy her 1st birthday tomorrow!

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Update- Fundraiser

I don't know really what to say...let me start out with THANK YOU!

Thank you to the many friends who donated.

Thank you to the many of you who donated and who don't even know us.

Thank you to each and every one of you who made such meaningful donations and for spreading the news these past 12 days.

When I made the goal of $2,000 I really thought it was a far after day I would see the donations roll in and was so amazed. Not only did we reach the goal, but so far we are $322 over that goal and still have some coming in.

It was so awesome to see so many of you out there with such caring hearts. I know alot of you have followed us this past year on this unexpected journey that we've been on. It still amazes me when I am at the store or out and about and I hear someone ask me if I am Brianna and they tell me that they read this blog or have been praying for Berlyn and our family. I want to say thank you for all of your support and your prayers. We couldn't have made it through this journey without you.

Thank you, Thank you, Thank you!

Thursday, January 27, 2011

Fundraiser update

Just wanted to update everyone on the fundraiser so far. We are at $1,227.00!!! Over half way there and we still have 18 more days!! Thank you all so much for your support. I am very hopeful we will reach our goal! Please keep spreading the word. :) If you still haven't donated and would like to you can go directly to The Joyful site here or by clicking the donate button to the right of this post. Thank you again!!


The Adams Family

Monday, January 24, 2011

Fundraiser update

We are only a few days in to the fundraiser and we are getting close to half way there. The total is now at $642.00. That is a little over 32 blankets that will be going to someone who really needs to be lifted up! I am amazed by every ones love and support for a good cause! We even had two donors that are cancer survivors! We also had a young boy donate some of his allowance after hearing about what we're doing. So thankful to all of you!!

Please remember if you do donate you can either go directly to The Joyful foundation site by clicking here, or if you would rather do it through paypal you can click on the donate button to the right.

I will keep everyone updated on our progress!

Thank you, Thank you, Thank you!!

Friday, January 21, 2011

Berlyn's Fundraiser

Can't even believe that our little girl is almost 1. As this day is fast approaching I have had so many mixed emotions. This year has been such a crazy year. Last year around this time I just wanted this baby out and to meet her. I never in a million years would have guess our baby would have anything wrong with her.

March 30th, 2010 my life was turned upside down. On that day I found out that Berlyn had a heart defect and would require a balloon dilation that following week. That whole week was a blur. Since that day I have seen life so different. Before all this I just went about my business and thought this stuff happened to "other" people. I have always had a generous heart but never really went out of my way to make a difference until her. She has made me who I want to be and made me appreciate life and see things so differently. All this pain I've experienced over the years has really opened my eyes to see there is way more to life. And for that I am thankful.

As her birthday approaches I am thankful for each and everyday with her. She has become such a fun, sweet girl.

I wanted to make her birthday special and to mean something more than just cake and ice cream and toys. I have decided that I wanted to give back to other children and families that are going through those hard painful days that seems like there is no end in sight. I have decided to do a fundraiser for The Joyful Foundation in honor of Berlyn's first birthday. The Joyful foundation is an organization of all volunteers that sews blankets for hospitals, cancer centers, heart patients, patients that are getting chemotherapy and dialysis as well as victims of spousal abuse and their children. They donated an awesome "heart" blanket with her name on it. Which we take everywhere with us.

I don't think anyone will ever understand the amount of pain someone goes through unless they are in that position or have to see their child go through something so traumatic as heart surgery or cancer or many other serious problems. The joyful foundation has so much demand for blankets for kids like the girl below that they really can't keep up.

Joyful Foundation patient who just got her blanket

I know times are tough for alot of people so I'm not asking for much. I have set my goal to raise $2,000. I know that seems like alot but I am hopeful that I can reach that goal and be able to tell Berlyn and show her how we celebrated her first birthday. If you feel lead to give anything even if it's $5.00 that will help out tremendously. If you would like to donate online you can go here Make sure that you write in the comment section "Berlyn". Thank you from the bottom of our "hearts" I will be updating everyone and let you know if we reached the goal!!

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Broken Heart

I've been wanting to post now for the past few days and kept thinking of things to write and between the crying, researching, working and chasing after kids I really just avoided it all together.

Finally I have a few minutes and wanted to share with you on the status of Berlyn. Monday was her follow up cardiology appointment since her last hospital visit. I was already having a bad morning and was hoping that this wasn't a sign of things to come. Unfortunately, for us this was a sign of how the rest of the day would go.

I asked my Grandma to go with me to the appointment to be with me and keep an eye on Aven for me. I had this gut feeling it was gonna not be news I wanted to hear alone. It didn't take the doctor long to look at her and let me know that he had a good feeling that within the next year or so Berlyn would most likely have to again have the balloon dilation performed. Hearing those words was like a stab to my chest. I tried to play it cool but was screaming inside. WHY??? WHY AGAIN??? I know what the risks of doing another one is. You risk stretching the valve again and risk causing it to leak. We also discussed the possibility of having to one day repair or replace her valve. I know that everyone says that everything will be ok and just take it one day at a time. It's just not easy to not think about what could be a great possibility down the road. I was fine up until the office door closed behind me. I just stood there and cried. I always read about this stuff that happened to other children. Never in a million years would I have pictured myself going down this road.

It amazes me that in a matter of minutes how your life can be changed forever. On Monday I felt like life as I once knew it came to a halt as the rest of the world carried on around me. It was my Moms birthday and I was having everyone over to celebrate. I didn't want to ruin the day so I tried my best to put a smile on my face and act like I wasn't breaking down inside. Sometimes you never realize things living in your perfect world that there are bigger things out there. Things that can bring you to your knees in an instant. Things that have kept you from seeing the true meaning of life and what it really means to live.

Monday night I kept looking at Berlyn thinking how can this laughing baby possibly have anything wrong with her?

Being told that there is something wrong with your child is probably one of the hardest things to hear as a parent. You start feeling so many emotions all at one time and feel so quickly overwhelmed. You go from being shocked, angry, helpless as you realize there is nothing that you can do to change the situation and have so much fear of not knowing where the next day or months will take you.

It starts to seem like everything around you begins to suffer. I have watched my friendships become closer and even some fade away. I have watched as my marriage takes a hit as we both try and learn to come together and deal with our grief on many different levels. (I tend to be more open with my feelings, I think he thinks he has to be the tough one and not show them.) There are so many hardships that come along with this kind of news that can either break you if you let them. Or can make you stronger and realize the important things that really matter.

It breaks my heart to come to realize I don't have the perfect, healthy child that I always dreamed of having and living the life I thought I would. I have found hope that although this new journey is full of many uncertainties that my faith and ability to trust God fully with this will guide me through this journey. I have found joy in the simple things and have learned to cherish each and every single moment with my family.

I know God performed his first miracle with Berlyn's life when we were able to find out at a unrelated urgent care appointment that she even had anything wrong with her heart. I know for a fact that if we didn't find out that day that she might not be around today.

Berlyn is a precious miracle to us and I thank God for her everyday for her and for the changes I have made in my life because of having her here.