Monday, April 5, 2010

Letter to my baby girl!


Nothing could have ever prepared me for the overwhelming love I have for my children. When I first cuddled my beautiful, soft, warm, sweet smelling girl in my arms, I knew I had fallen in love for the rest of my life. I was so worried when I first found out I was pregnant if I would be able to love another little human the way I loved your brother. I loved you even before you came into this world. The second you were born my heart was filled with even more love. You were perfect! I knew that, forevermore, I would again know fear, I would know worrying, and knowing I wanted to protect you with my life.


After getting the news last week that you had a problem with your heart I was devastated. How could this be? Being your Mom thoughts ran through my mind of every question. Will she still be able to live a long meaningful life and be able to do all the fun things little girls do? Will she look like me? Will she want to do ballet? Will she have my personality and like to play jokes on people? Will she grow up and get married and have a family of her own? Then I thought these are not questions that I will ever be able to answer. All I know is that you will live the life that God has called you to.


Tonight as I prepare to hand you over to doctors that I don't even know I want you to know that I love you more than anything in this world. I know you were special from the time you were born. I never would have imagined that only 7 weeks after you were born we would be going through all this with you. I don't have the answers as to why this is happening but I know you will get through all this. You are such a strong girl and I would take your place if I could.


My precious Berlyn, I delight in the joy of your simple existence.


Love,


Your Mom


8 comments:

Megs said...

How precious Brianna! It's so true about the love the Lord gives us for our babies. The Lord is going to carry you guys through this. Remember Jeremiah 29:11..."For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope." You were in my thoughts and prayers today and I will be praying without ceasing for Berlyn and your family tomorrow. God bless you guys!

Marsha said...

Oh, Brianna, I understand your lamentations. Hang in there! Your sweet girl is not in the hands of doctors you don't even know. Little Berlyn is in the hands of the One who created her. He will control all that goes on tomorrow and beyond. She is in the best Hands!

Praying and praying for you all,

Marsha

The Gustafson Family said...

Beautiful!! Thinking of you..and saying extra special prayers tonight!! {hugs}

Paige said...

Praying for your family!

Heather said...

That was beautiful Brianna. I am still praying for you all during this hard time. Berlyn is a strong little girl with a family that loves her so much, and most importantly a God that loves her more than anything!

P.S. I love that picture :)

Love Being a Nonny said...

Praying RIGHT NOW for your niece...precious!

JenCoen said...

Brianna, you and your beautiful family are in my thoughts and prayers.

Trish said...

We are praying for your little girl!